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They say that nobody hates war more than the soldier who has lived through one. Still, it can be said in truth that nobody hates war more than the children of the soldier who dies at war. The same thing can be said about somebody whose brother died at war, or someone who lost their spouse, their son or daughter or a friend.

That should give us a pretty long list of people who hate war as much as the soldier who lived through one. I lost my father when I was 9 years old to the Vietnam War. That’s a hole in my life that won’t go away, ever. It might crust over like a scab but it’s there and sometimes something picks at the scab and some of the pain surfaces. Losing a loved one to war is something I wish on no one meaning nobody else anywhere should lose a loved one to war.

I’m pretty sure that the only morally justifiable war is one of defense and military success will best be found in the wars that never start but I don’t know what it will take to stop our current crop of chicken hawks from beating the drums of war. Just know that they probably have nothing or no one to lose and nothing but money and power to gain.

Even as the orphan of one who died at war, I along with countless others have no experience that puts into context the horrors battle weary soldiers have seen and experienced but here’s the worst of it; it’s what war made these people do to others on the battlefield, it’s what they had to become in order to survive that should curb our enthusiasm to send someone else’s kids to go to war.

Memorial Day is a day we pay our respects to those who fought and died in war but the best way to honor these men and women is to find a way to end war.